FORGIVENESS VS. REDEMPTION
En Vogue, Salt-n-Pepa, and TLC are going on tour together. Sounds like it would be a good show. That thought was confirmed for me as I watched their recent performance together, essentially previewing the tour. Then when Chili made her way to the foreground of the stage, I thought uh-oh because there was already scuttlebutt about her reposting a derogatory image of Michelle Obama. I wondered if the story would grow legs and cause a problem for the tour.
Sure enough the story grew legs. Details of political donations and her voting history have emerged. Previous questionable comments related to colorism and all lives matter have been revisited. How much of a problem it will cause the tour in the end, however, remains to be seen.
Should this revelation cause a problem for the tour? Based on the current outcry the answer is yes to that question.
Let me say for the record that I’m not in favor of the sentiment that who you vote for shouldn’t matter. It does matter. Our votes are expressions of who we are and what we believe, for better and for worse. Our votes are not inconsequential. Our votes determine how we are governed. We do not have to divulge how we vote. I believe in the right to privacy in that regard. But gone are the days where we dismiss it, especially if it is pridefully touted. If you are afforded a larger platform, then the potential for greater scrutiny awaits. So we need to be wise. Not just in whether or not to be private about it, but wise in how we decide who to vote for. We should critically question is our vote the best option for representing who we are, what we believe, who we want to engage with and most importantly how we should be governed?
We really shouldn’t take the path of least resistance and keep our vote secret. While I respect people’s privacy not to disclose how they vote, I can’t say that it’s an overall healthy practice. Of course there are exceptions but generally speaking, keeping secrets very rarely bodes well for us. As I have said before. The truth is we’ve always known the potential for politics to fracture relationships. That’s why talking about politics has been considered taboo. Collectively, we decided it was best to avoid wading into political conversations for fear of discomfort and fracture. Willful avoidance and willful denial were the order of the day and we had no reason to believe that order would ever change. Until the 2016 presidential election and everything since. We have been compelled to speak on what was once held secret for better and for worse. What these secrets have unearthed in some cases has proven to be irreconcilable. Our worst fears have sadly come true.
Speaking of voting, please vote for my niece’s audio drama. Red for Revolution has been nominated for two Webby Awards.
1. Best Scripted Fiction
2. Best Original Music/Sound Design
It’s probably best to type '‘Red for Revolution'‘ in the Search bar on the page instead of scrolling through each category to find it. Only one vote is allowed per category. Voting is open until Thursday, April 16th.
Now I’m not so quick to judge this Chili situation as irreconcilable. I’m not so quick to call anything irreconcilable. We’ve all fallen short including politically. It’s impossible to walk this tight rope purity standard that we hold one another to. Because, unfortunately, we are inextricably linked in one way or another to a personal or business political entanglement. If we all abide by this purity standard, then we wouldn’t be able to exist. We wouldn’t be able to work because our employers are compromised. We wouldn’t be able to buy anything because retailers are compromised. We wouldn’t be able to entertain ourselves because those industries are compromised. Our own tax dollars betray us because we can’t get out of paying them. Think about it…we fund corruption.
My point is a measure of grace and mercy is always in order. Forgiveness is a posture of the heart or a permanent attitude as Dr. King says. I believe we struggle with maintaining this posture because we confuse forgiveness with redemption. Forgiveness is the responsibility of the offendED while redemption is the responsibility of the offendER. Forgiveness is about releasing feelings of resentment, ill-will, and vengeance, not necessarily as means of facilitating reconciliation but to facilitate our individual spiritual, emotional, mental, even physical well being.
By the way, pursuing vengeance and pursuing justice are two different things. But I won’t digress on that difference right now. However I go into detail about the differences between the two and take a deeper look into the differences between forgiveness and redemption in a book that I’ve written. Details of the book remain under wraps but please be in faith with me for proper representation and a publishing deal.
Redemption, on the other hand, is about owning mistakes, repentance, learning from mistakes, rehabilitating our identity, and earnestly working to restore trust, even if it’s solely restoring trust within ourselves to be better and do better. Forgiveness is not an endorsement of redemption. Societally, we often mistakenly conflate the two. Both, however, are required if there is to be any chance of reconciliation, if reconciliation is the goal. When reconciliation is not the goal, we erroneously assume that we have been let off the hook to forgive if we’ve been harmed or let off the hook to redeem ourselves if we’ve caused harm. Neither is the case. Unforgiveness is spiritual poison and the process of redemption is about individual transformation. We need to be better for our own well-being, if for no one else.
As for the situation at hand, from the reporting that I’ve heard, it appears that Chili has been rattled by this backlash. When it comes to being devoted to our religious faith, it’s hard to fathom that we could ever be led astray by it and that doing anything in the name of it could ever be wrong. I once voted based on “Christian values.” Beyond a shadow of a doubt, I’m sure I wouldn’t have been convinced that I was ever in error back then. For whatever reason, what may have been obvious to others wasn’t as obvious to me. At times I questioned some ideas but figured it would all come out in the wash. Eventually I allowed myself to deconstruct what I had come to believe and ultimately calibrated my beliefs for myself.
At this point in our history, this is just where we are. The evidence of corruption, hatred, reactionary intentions, bullying, lack of ethics, poor character, grandiosity, unseriousness and incompetence are obvious to many, if not most, but for whatever reason not obvious to all. I’ve certainly been aggravated by the lack of clarity because the stakes are too high. Yet it remains the case that “we should’ve known better” doesn’t hold. We know when we know. And when that moment arrives the two processes of forgiveness and redemption should immediately go into effect.
Let’s do our part in Harmonious Balance, my friends!
Johanna
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